The 3-3-3 Rule of Adopting a Shelter Dog [Quick Guide]

Adopting a shelter dog is exciting but it can also feel a bit overwhelming. You might wonder, “How can I help them settle in?” That’s where the ‘3-3-3 rule' comes into play.

It's a simple way to understand their adjustment period and set realistic expectations: three days to decompress, three weeks to learn routines, and three months to feel fully comfortable.

Trust me, this very quick guide can be a lifesaver (for you and your new doggo). Stick around, and you'll learn how to make this transition smooth and stress-free.

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Importance of Adjustment

If you are bringing home a shelter dog, it is so important to understand that they need time. These dogs went from a known environment, whether loving or abusive, to a shelter, and now they are in your environment.

Being in a shelter is stressful enough, but then going into an environment where everything is different yet again will cause additional stress.

I get it, you take a dog out of a shelter and you expect instant gratitude and love but that's now how it works. So, what does work?

Well, there are several ways you can help your new shelter pupper adjust, but this quick 3-3-3 rule should be your guide timeline-wise — first 3 days; next 3 weeks; 3 months onwards.

The 3-3-3 Rule Explained

The well-known 3-3-3 rule breaks the adjustment period down into manageable stages: the first 3 days, the next 3 weeks, and from 3 months onwards.

Each phase represents a milestone where your new companion will begin to show signs of adapting to his home.

These ‘rules' help you with a set timeline, although, keep in mind you are dealing with living beings. Just like people, animals don't follow the same exact timeline.

Remember, this is just a general guide, so don't be discouraged if things might take a little longer 😉.

First 3 Days: Decompression

Imagine stepping into a completely foreign world — and not for the first time. You went from your trusted environment (whether loving or not) to a shelter. Then you go from a shelter to a new home (maybe even your 2nd or 3rd!). This will be pretty overwhelming, right?!

That's exactly how many shelter dogs feel…overwhelmed and scared. Some dogs might be extra shy and hide away; others might become a velcro-dog, clinging to you everywhere you go — shelter dogs often develop separation anxiety.

Some dogs won't eat, others may bark or pace excessively from stress. It's important to realise that in most cases, this is not the dog's normal behaviour.

During this stage, it is crucial that you don't ‘baby' or coddle the dog — this can either make him/her more scared or it can lead to you accepting behaviours that you would not accept otherwise, such as being on the sofa.

How Can You Help?

• Be patient.
• Stay positive.
• Get into a routine — routine and predictability will help them settle into your life much quicker and more confidently.
• Stay calm and give clear directions, including setting boundaries — No means no.
• Don't introduce new people or places — keep his world small so as to not overwhelm him more.
• Give your dog the time and space to observe the house and all the people living there, even if it's from a distance.
• Don't force interaction — you can try and initiate if you feel your dog is receptive, but let it go when he doesn't react.

Next 3 Weeks: Settling In

By this point, your dog is starting to feel more comfortable and confident and should start exploring his surroundings. This is the time his real personality will begin to shine…for better or worse 😅.

Like a toddler, this is the time your dog will start testing your freshly set boundaries. This can be anything from being on the sofa to chewing on your shoes. This is normal, they are trying to figure out your rules and if, just maaaaaybe, they can get you to reconsider — I mean, one might never know 😜.

Don't get angry when this happens but stand firm and ensure you keep showing your boundaries. This ‘boundary testing' is why it is so important you do not want to coddle your dog — if you let him on the sofa because ‘you feel bad for him' but actually you kinda don't want him on the sofa, then you are already setting both of you up for potential failure during this stage.

How Can You Help?

• Be consistent in routines and boundaries, especially when boundaries are going to be tested.
• Work on basic training — this is a good time to teach commands like sit, stay, etc. Not only is it good for the dog to learn commands (obviously), but training with your dog also increases your bond and trust.
• Positive reinforcements — every success, no matter how small it may be, positively reinforce it. You want to reward good behaviour, it makes your dog more confident.
• Continue the calm and clear directions and boundaries you started in the first 3 days.
• Introductions — during this time, you can slowly start to introduce new people (one at a time!) and environments (that does not include the walks you took him on in the first 3 days).

From 3 Months Onwards: Trust and Routine

Now, this is the time that the magic happens! Around the 3-month mark, most dogs will begin to fully integrate into your family, your routines, and your environment.

This is also the time that your dog's true personality will start showing…that also means that any unwanted behaviours can pop up that you might have to work on — behaviours that he did not pick up at your place but at his previous owner(s).

Unwanted behaviour can be many things, such as jumping up at people or excessive barking. However, in most cases, you don't need expensive dog trainers.

In fact, you can teach your new pupper with force-free methods from anywhere in the world, and from the comfort of your own home. How? Simple: enroll in Adrienne Farricelli's Brain Training for Dogs course! Adrienne is a CPDT-KA certified dog trainer from the US who ‘gets it'.

Her course is easy to follow, you get full support, and loads of extras.

Another thing to keep in mind: many shelter dogs develop separation anxiety, and that can show itself at any stage! I would suggest getting help from a dog trainer in person rather that trying to tackle this yourself.

You have laid the foundations of trust, and the creation of a true bond with your dog, and now is the time to keep the momentum going. By this time, if you have followed the guidelines, your dog should be comfortable and feel secure with you.

These deeper signs of trust could be as simple as him snuggling up with you (on his own accord!) or the classic waggy tail, happy-go-lucky dog when you come home.

Your dog is now set into his routine, so he might now come to expect his dinner at his usual time 😜.

Just remember that your work is not yet done, though. You need to keep reinforcing good behaviours and socialise him in a safe, and controlled way. If you keep up the work, your dog will truly start to feel like he belongs and you start to create that unbreakable bond.

* Note: you are welcome to use this infographic on your website/blog, however you must attribute Your Perfect Pupper and link to this blog post!

Final Thoughts

Taking a dog out of a shelter is a good feeling — One that I know all too well! However, one thing people tend to forget is that, just as with puppies, shelter dogs need time to adjust.

It can be daunting to try and remember it all, so make a note, print out the infographic above, whatever you need as a reminder.

Use the 3-3-3 rule and help your dog settle in to his new home.

Did you know about the 3-3-3 rule already? Drop your comments down below!

Remember to pin an image to your favourite pet board!

*Please note: some of the images in this blog post are AI-generated with prompts created by me. These images do not serve an educational purpose.